Let’s Talk About Balance

A popular topic around beauty blogs and magazines is that of face shapes and determining which cuts/makeup/etc.etc.etc. is right for you.  Now, I am a little bit untraditional.  I didn’t grow up feeling like I had to look more Caucasian or like Barbie.  I felt no pressure to wear makeup or even really to style my hair, although trying to keep my skin healthy and have a good cut was important to me.  I never remember people telling me that I needed to look a particular way.

Modern style isn’t about looking a uniform way.  It isn’t about everyone having one haircut, or one of five haircuts.  People are even willing to embrace their natural texture.  And yet, sometimes the verbiage I hear when discussing face shapes in the salon is very outdated.

First off, I don’t believe in using hair to conceal.  I believe in using hair to balance.  It sounds like a meaningless linguistic difference, but really I think it denotes an important shift in mindset.  If we believe our faces behold some defect, and our mission is to disguise ourselves, that puts a limit on the joy you can get from your haircut because you feel like, “Well, I really want ______, but because of _____ I have to have _____ instead.”  Even if someone using this formulation does like their haircut, they probably would like it more if they didn’t feel like it was one of their only choices.  Besides, sometimes when the only goal is to conceal, it backfires and just points more attention towards whatever is being hidden.  The most exaggerated version of this is the extreme combover.

When we talk about balance it is all about creating harmony with the client.  And it isn’t just about face shape.  It is about individual facial features, overall body shape, size, overall style and personality.  It’s about drawing attention to the positives and working with overall (objective) shapes in order to create something visually appealing.  It isn’t about oval being good and square being bad it is about creating a cut that is holistic, that embraces the client’s individuality.  Some women look darn good with a strong jawline and whether the woman wants a strong shape or a soft shape depends more on where she is in her career and with her life than on something being “right.”  Sometimes obsessing about face shape will cause you to miss a golden opportunity in highlighting gorgeous eyes.  And you can give the perfect cut to create an illusion of slightly more height on a petite woman, but if it doesn’t fit her personality, what is the point?

It’s not about one style looking bad, it is about another looking better.

I believe that cuts and color services should be flattering, but I don’t believe in black and white rules.  I don’t believe in approaching a service with a list of things I can’t do.  I believe that as a hairstylist, my vision for my client should be both attentive to their overall aesthetic and sensitive to who they are as person and where they are in their life.  I believe that part of my job is to instill pride and comfort in one’s own body, in one’s own identity.

Notes from Sebastian Training, January 2014

Yes, there were times where I felt like I had flippers for hands. Yes, I was mentally exhausted from so much new information. And yes, it was the perfect start to 2014, at least in terms of my career.

First off, I left Pittsburgh in the nick of time! I have never experienced subzero temperatures so I was thrilled to be flying away as Pittsburgh thermometers were descending to unfamiliar depths. But with the unusual iciness it was not easy to get to Los Angeles! But after a few risks and a few miracles, I made it, and was soon sharing a shuttle to Woodland Hills with some of my favorites: Meghan, Josh and Tony! Such a positive and fun group to be around. They are so easy to be around, it’s easy for me to forget that I’d just met them last summer and that this training was technically my first.

Shortly after, I was reunited with Anthony, Isa, Matthew, Oscar and Heather Rae the next morning, and of course getting to see all of the core team, Christina and Carole, and a bunch of other cool dudes on Urban and Design Team that I don’t know quite as well.

Training started with a wonderful talk from Stephen Moody, the charismatic and successful Brit who has been all throughout recent hair history. His stage presence was inspiring. Then we jumped into the nitty gritty and got our hands on the blades and the shears and I felt like I had flippers for hands, trying so hard to get the cuts perfect. Over the next few days, more cuts, some styling and them presenting in pairs.

Throughout training, and really the last few months, I have felt weighed down by big decisions, most of the decisions circling around the concept of who I want to be. The last day of training I had a bit of a moment, where a lot clicked for me. We had an acting coach come in to guide us through some skits. I had a lot of fun with it and was very eager to jump up and do everything. The coach had started to rely on me as a goto Ginny pig. But then all of a sudden he wanted us to speak about things we loved. Could be anything, silly, deep, person, place, hobby, anything. I cycled through my brain thinking about what I could actually talk about without getting too emotional or sounding too crazy and nothing seemed like it was really representing me and really, at the heart of the matter, I am an extremely private person. Ultimately, I am fairly open to any specifics but always afraid of being type cast, put in a box.

Realizing how much I actually did hate talking about myself was somewhat eye opening. Of course the coach called on me first, and I gave him the, don’tmakemego eyes, and he let me off the hook for awhile. When everyone else went I thought a lot about what a love and what represents me as a person and as a hair stylist. I came up with a pretty good answer, I ended up not sharing it though because I got a good opportunity to talk about storing food in my purse on end and took the easy out.

But what I would’ve said is that what I love is helping people find themselves. I love looking in someone’s eyes and seeing what they need and knowing when I can give them what they need and knowing when they need time. I love healing people who hurt, distracting people from pain, getting people to think about what is important to them, which often times makes them realize they have most if not everything they need. I love making people feel the truth that they are special.

And that is why I started doing hair.

🙂 🙂 🙂

Stocking Noir Catalogue Shoot: Jardin Noir Collection

Hello! My friend’s stocking company has just launched its new collection: Jardin Noir. Check out it out online.

Today I wanted to feature some behind the scenes shots from my shoot with them and tell you what I used to create the looks. Photos by Maria Palermo with Barlow Black styling Elysia’s new collection. Model is Alli Frasier of Taxi Management.

On her face:
Prepped with Embryolisse and a spritz of De-Slick from Urban Decay
Face Atelier Ultra Foundation, mixture of shades 1 and 2
Face Atelier Ultra Sheer champagne adjuster for brightening
Graftobian Warm #1 foundation palette for highlight/contour
Graftobian cream blush palette
Urban Decay Prime Potion for eyes
Lime Crime China Doll Palette (used black for eyeliner)
Ultimate Face eye shadow palette
Lip tar
All brushes from Sephora and e.l.f.

On her hair:
1″ Hot Tools marcel iron just to touch up natural curl
Whipped Creme from Sebastian Professional to polish curls/tame frizz
Shaper from Sebastian Professional

Why Short(er) Hair Actually is More Flattering on a Lot of People

So, a lot of the celebrities this year have inspired women to consider going shorter with their hair. Yet, most women in my chair just sigh and say, “If I had the perfect oval face shape,” or “If I lost twenty pounds,” and on and on. The bottom line is that women are afraid of no longer looking feminine because in other ways they don’t feel like they match up to the feminine ideal.

I am an advocate of shorter hair on women so I am just thrilled about Karlie Kloss, Anne Hathaway and other celebrity stunners that have gone significantly shorter. In the case that having a feminine ideal is unavoidable, which it seems to be for most of our society, at least these ladies are rounding out that image, because let’s face it, most of us can’t get that Victoria Secret hair. Even most of the Angels can’t without the help of extensions and celebrity stylists working magic.

One thing that just kills me as a hairdresser is to see women hanging on to hair way past their shoulder blades when it is only five strands at the bottom, damaged to hell and back and laying limp. I don’t let anyone leave my chair like this, but I see it all the time in public. No one could possibly take a step back and think, “This hair cut is extremely flattering on me.”

This year, the trends are shoulders and above. Of course, really long hair is always in when it is gorgeous long hair, but I try to get the average client to clavicle length if their locks are less than ephemeral. The reason for this is because it frames the face and décolleté better and you have more freedom with layers. It is easier to get a balanced shape and for most clients they are able to do more with the styling.

Bobs (anything between the shoulder and the jawline) are wonderful on so many more women than realize it. They can add so much body to limp hair and they are also wonderful because they grow out well and you can change them in a lot of subtle ways without having long grow out phases. Longer bobs can still be styled in most of the same ways you can style longer hair, such as curling and things like that. You can’t do as much with updos, but I don’t really understand why people want to punish themselves day to day so that they can have an updo once every three years. It seems like it might have to do with fairy tale fantasies? I don’t know. All I know is, I would rather look fabulous every day than a couple times per decade.

A lot of women are insistent that they could never do anything above the jawline but I am here to tell you that you are probably wrong. If there are any issues with the cheek/jaw area long hair my be making the issue worse by visually dragging it down. Shorter hair can’t hide anything but it can de-emphasize areas by drawing attention upwards, lifting, and bringing focus to the eyes. That is truly what I love most about short hairstyles. They are always customized to really compliment a face and draw attention to the eyes, which is almost always the most unique and expressive part of a woman.

A lot of women look incredible with long hair. Some could with a lot of styling, but never style it (and who can blame them?). I love seeing long braids and cascading waves, but when i see people just letting hair hang and collect damage, my spine aches. Some just probably weren’t meant to have repunzel hair. And that is ok! I just hate to hear people say they can’t do something and blame their bones, their weight, society or anything else! You can do what you want and look spectacular and I am just here to help.